Just Do It. Just Wrestle.

I finally set down to wrestle with the application for a job that I want.

I’ve been putting it off.

Intellectually, I know that it’s really not that complicated.  All I have to do is fill out the online application and send two introductory emails.  And while I know that they probably shouldn’t, the introductory emails make me want to break out in hives.

Ridiculous or not, I am practically reverberating with nerves.

I don’t have a lot of faith in my Mind to Keyboard filter.  My mom is right, I tell everything that I think I know.  Because the tension of miscommunication makes me overhwelmingly uncomfortable.

I can’t always tell the difference between what not to share and what to just share a little bit of.  And if I’m only sharing a morsel of information I don’t know where the line is between what is necessary and what may startle the living daylights out of somebody.

Essentially, I have no information boundaries.  I am not the best negotiator, but an excellent persuader.  I’m okay at poker.

I had to sit down and wrestle with this: write, rewrite, free write, draw diagramms…a lot of effort all to determine what to share and what to keep quiet about.


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