Last night I experienced a Trigger Event, when one completely innocuous and trivial episode set off a whole round of ghoulish behavior.
It was my first real attempt to debug my computer of it’s virus. But after a few hours of what could only be deemed Recovery Disk Failure, frustration at Joe for not having a magic wand or crystal ball, and utter disbelief that a pamphlet with pertinent related information did not accompany the disks, I was on the cusp on an outright meltdown.
But really, I was just flat-out annoyed with myself. Because I was able to link an inability to resuscitate a computer through the land of deprivation and to every reason why I won’t get a job.
As the curtain opens, the Diva enters the stage for a dramatic monologue.
DIVA: Listen. If you can’t take care of your computer then you don’t deserve to have one. You will always only be able to use the internet in 45 minute increments at the Wake County Public Library which will make it almost impossible to apply for jobs. Because when you are trapped by time constraints you panic. Particularly when looming deadlines feel falsely imposed and cut short the achievement of quality. Since you can’t stay calm and clear-headed long enough to submit a written application, you definitely won’t get a job. All because you can’t take care of a computer.
As the curtain closes on the Diva, the audience stares at each other wide-eyed with looks that says, “Neurotic. Totally. Over. The. Top.”
I get it. I know how it sounds. But it was 45 minutes of an otherwise pleasant day. I’ll take it in stride.